I know I didn’t fool you with that whacked title. You know I mean some vermin.
But let me tell you what happened, because I really do feel like Shit now.
There were some Wasps that had set up home in my Fucking Window and were building what could only be described as the next Wasp New York City. They were really going to town.
I always say “live and let live” unless you Piss me off. Or you’re a Bug that’s going to sting me.
Now I don’t know how I can be so freakin’ fabulous but still not have anyone I can count on to take care of these things for me, so I opened the window and vacuumed away the wasps and the nests and everything, but Mrs. Momma Wasp saw me coming and flew away. She came back a couple of times, but I couldn’t get her.
So I started feeling really guilty about how I’d wiped out her whole family and hive-city, and I started wondering what this little wasp must be thinking. But my pondering only lasted about 15 minutes, because I am easily distracted.
Well wouldn’t you know it, the next afternoon I open the door and Mama Wasp flies into the house!
WTF? Her nest wasn’t even near the door, it was in another room, on the outside of the window. But I guess she figured things out and came to see if her family was inside the house. Or she came to Kill me. One of those anyway.
So I vacuumed her up too, and now they are all together again.
(Hey after I led with that Dumb title were you expecting a Dean Koontz novel?)