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Jun 28

A Brief Word About Service Surveys

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lol @ me being “brief” right?   It seems that everyone wants you to do a fucking service or product survey.

Kudos to the little surveys on the back of fast food restaurant receipts that offer a free item or discount.  The receipt surveys are short and they proffer little rewards.  But my love of service surveys ends with them!

It REALLY PISSES ME OFF that companies NEVER EVER respond to you regarding your survey answers no matter what you put in them.  You can report in a survey that the food you ate was poison or the customer service person screamed and then hung up on you, but you’re not going to get a response.  It seems like your comments fall into a black hole.

Additionally, some of these surveys take awhile to finish and don’t offer any incentives.  If you want me to spend the time on your damned survey, then give me a prize instead of asking me to donate my time to your company.

But my real gripe about these surveys is that I know they’re being used to fuck over the consumer:

1) Your information may be used to try sell you something else later.

2)  A negative response may be used to implement even worse changes than the bad shit they’re already doing.

3)  Responses that you had a good experience are used to justify the reduction in the quality of the service/product and an excuse to increase the price.  So if you say you like what they’re doing, they’re going to change it and make it worse, because they know they have the margin to do it.

You should also know that call agent surveys are used mostly to punish the poor shmuck who had to take your call by decreasing their compensation for low scores.  This only benefits the executives who wind up with bonus money.

So the bottom line Is that it is never to your advantage to cooperate.

Brief enough?

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